As the popularity of kink has grown in our sex lives, so have the misconceptions about BDSM, which is always seen as violent or abusive, and even considered kinky. But that's not true - BDSM can be safe, healthy, and comforting.
So what exactly is kink?
With the popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey, kinks are becoming more and more common and well-known in everyday life, and while many people have the inherent impression that kinks are violent and abusive, kinks can also be safe and comfortable to explore and experience.
What are the benefits of incorporating twisting into your sex life?
Incorporating BDSM into your sex life will undoubtedly bring new and exciting sensations and add a new level of eroticism to your life. It allows for a better understanding of your preferences, boundaries, and kinks, and a more intimate relationship with your partner. It can also relieve stress, boost self-confidence, etc. while exploring power dynamics.
What are some common BDSM activities?
BDSM activities include submissive-domination in addition to shock play, bondage play, and edge play, but as a newcomer don't dive in headfirst at the beginning, take it gradually and slowly.
If you are not sure what you like at the beginning, it is important to educate yourself properly, learn about activities on the internet and make a wish list that you can better explore. Preparing a yes, no, maybe list also allows for better documentation and understanding of activities and behaviors that each other would like to try and enjoy.
How can I safely incorporate kinks into my sex life?
1. Educate yourself
If you want to try a new activity, it's important to know about it, its boundaries, norms, and precautions. Self-education also allows you to better understand what you want, what activities and behaviors you enjoy, and to better express yourself to your partner, popularize it, and arouse your partner's excitement and desire.
2. Communication and consent
Communication is the foundation of everything, and it's important to have open and honest communication with your partner before trying a new activity. Choose a suitable environment where both partners feel relaxed. Communicate sincerely to express your desires, understand each other's preferences, and ask for your partner's consent.
But the boundaries of people's preferences change, so a one-time communication is not a one-time fix, so it's important to stay sex-positive in your daily life and keep communicating with your partner to better incorporate kink into your life.
3. Establish boundaries and safe words
Knowing and respecting each other's boundaries and setting up safe words that spoil the atmosphere, such as red, green, yellow, can be a good way to inform your partner of your feelings and can be good feedback. Observe your partner's reactions during sex, and when your partner calls out a safe word, respect and calm your partner's emotions.
4. Safety measures
Choose safe activities and ways to explore in the beginning, but prepare a medical first aid kit that can be sterilized and emergency bandages to protect your health in case of problems.
5. Sex Toys
Don't blindly buy sex toys when you first start experimenting with BDSM activities. Don't blindly try popular products either. Know your preferences and what activities you are interested in before considering what props to buy are right for you.
Adding sex toys to your exploration of BDSM can go a long way toward enhancing the experience during sex and bringing about more pleasurable feelings. If you don't have a good idea about buying a new sex toy, I recommend this wand sex toy, which can bring very strong stimulation feelings, and is also a very BDSM-compliant sex toy, which is perfect whether you are a novice or an experienced person.
6. Explore sexual fantasies
You can better explore your sexual fantasies through role-playing. You can try to buy relevant costumes and props, and enjoy more immersed in the set storyline, setting up some character plots and relationships. For example, a doctor and a nurse, a teacher and a student, a dad and a little girl, etc.
Aftercare
Aftercare is one of the most important parts of BDSM, but it is also often under-appreciated or even overlooked. Aftercare not only takes good care of your partner physically, but more importantly, it soothes your partner psychologically. Physically, you can choose to hug, kiss on the cheek, hold hands, etc. After sex for the partner to clean the body parts, not only can protect the partner's health, at the same time to enhance the sense of intimacy. Good aftercare can bring the relationship closer as well as keep it positive for BDSM.
Final Thoughts
Twisting can bring new life and eroticism to your sex life and ignite a sexual spark.There are also many activities for BDSM exploration, shock, bondage, rim play, etc.As a novice you can try to start slowly and try something safe. Aftercare after sex is a very important part of the sexual experience and should not be ignored. Giving your partner some mental and spiritual care can also increase intimacy with each other.